Updated on October 23rd, 2023 at 07:36 pm

Having an active sex life is incredibly important to our overall mental and physical well-being. However, obese adults often feel as though their body weight reduces their sex appeal – and as a result, they lack sexual confidence. 

This lack of confidence can play a significant role in the overall quality of your sex life. Luckily, there are lots of ways you can be more confident in bed when you are overweight.

Engaging in different positions, sexy clothing, and changing your outlook on your body image can help restore your body confidence.

So, if you’re worried about how you can feel more confident in bed – read on to learn more! 

The Basics 

image of how to be confident in bed when overweight - Extra Large LivingWhen we have body image concerns, we often do things that we hope will boost our confidence level. This can be as basic as wearing baggy clothes to cover weight gain, or wearing black to make us appear slimmer.

However, when you’re engaging in sex you typically don’t have the option of being fully clothed. What you need to remember is that the physical activity of having sex is very important.

Everybody deserves to enjoy a physical, sexual relationship. To do so, you need body confidence. 

1. Choose The Right Partner 

Your sex partner will play a huge role in building your confidence. Plus-size women may often feel that their body type is not attractive – but that is just not true. 

To boost your confidence, it is always going to be beneficial to have sex with a partner that makes you feel good about yourself. These are partners that keep eye contact, boost your body positivity, and do not throw out inappropriate comments. 

These partners often transform into long-term relationships, and it’s easy to understand why. Remember, regardless of your body size or extra stretch marks – you deserve to be loved.

2. Limit Negativity 

More often than not, fat people are very hard on themselves and do not allow themselves to feel confident. If you do not provide your own self-confidence and love who you are, how can you expect to feel confident with others?

Your body shape is beautiful, and you need to remember that. It all starts with you – so if you want to be confident and loved in bed by others, start by loving yourself.

3. Practice Masturbation

Speaking of loving yourself, one of the best ways to boost your confidence with others in the bedroom is to love yourself in the bedroom. 

Many people decide to walk around the house more naked and masturbate when they feel the urge to. Getting that confidence to be naked at home and practicing sexual acts can provide a great platform to move forward with others.

4. Try Out Sex Positions 

Sometimes, fat women feel as though they are less attractive and lose confidence in the bedroom when they are in a specific sex position. The way to boost your confidence here is to try out new sexual positions which can help send your sexual confidence through the roof.

Your partner will love your body shape regardless of how you are positioned. Test out what positions work best for you, and this will also increase your sexual quality and pleasure.

For example, obese people sometimes feel the missionary position is uncomfortable. If this is the case for you, all you have to do is ask your partner for something different!

5. Communicate With Your Partner

image of how to be confident in bed when overweight - Extra Large LivingAs with the previous point, you should boost your confidence by speaking with your partner about your concerns and what makes you feel inadequate. It’s completely normal for fat people to think they are not as attractive as others – but this does not mean you are unattractive. 

Just tell your partner before you get down to business about your feelings and, if you’ve chosen the perfect sex partner, they will help to alleviate your concerns and make you feel amazing about yourself.

6. Try Out Sexy Outfits 

The right negligee can make a massive difference to your overall confidence. There are so many sexy choices out there for you to look through.

If you feel self-conscious about heading to a store, try out an online store that delivers discretely. Try out your new outfits and surprise your partner with your new, confident, and sexy outlook on the bedroom.

7. Avoid Comparisons 

This is a point that has been beaten to death, but it’s extremely important even if it does sound a little cliche. The media glamorize a specific body that women seem to think they should aspire to. 

The fact is, we are all different and we are all beautiful. It’s an impossible task to compare yourself to others, and all this does is make you feel less confident and upset.

Every partner will know of your beauty, and they will not expect you to appear like a woman from a magazine. Remember you are beautiful exactly how you are and do not force yourself to change for anybody else.

8. Stay In The Moment 

A common sexual mistake involves our minds. Sometimes, we can distract ourselves during sex because we’re constantly worried about our bodies. Obese people almost always have this problem, and the quality of their sex life is significantly less than it can be because they lack sexual confidence.

Try to block out your negative thoughts and poor body image. Stay in the moment. Sex is meant to be pleasurable and fun – so why make it a psychological attack on yourself? Focus on your pleasure and make yourself feel great.

The Bottom Line 

Regardless of your size, you deserve and are entitled to a healthy sex drive. However, to get the confidence you need, it all starts with you. 

If you follow our handy steps, you should be on your way to an amazing sex life, even with excess weight! 

For more information be sure to check out the rest of Extra Large Living.